School children's Thanksgiving Games, 11/27/11

It's that time of year again. Time to abandon the diet for a day, and live
like a king. No Thanksgiving goes by in our family without this recipe. And
my in-laws like it so well, they have adopted it, too. This is me, the
rookie cook, taking over one kitchen at a time.

So, here is the recipe for the best. stuffing. ever. You don't even need a
turkey to go with it. In my family, if you don't manufacture enough of this
to send everyone home with a full dish of it, you risk banishment from all
future family dinners. It's a depression-era recipe, meaning it was
concocted by someone who lived through the depression, so it's easy and
cheap. This recipe will make two 9 X 13 baking dishes of stuffing. Easily
expandable, or cut in half.

Mary's Old School Stuffing

Necessaries:

~Paper grocery bag
~2 loaves cheap white bread
~1 cup (2 sticks) butter or margarine
~Hot water
~1 large chopped onion, or about 2/3 of a 12 oz. bag frozen onions
~Salt, pepper, sage, to taste.
~GREAT BIG mixing bowl (I use a punch bowl or popcorn bowl)

Preparations:

The evening before: Tear bread into larger-than-bite-size pieces and leave
them in paper bag over night. The paper will absorb some of the moisture
from the bread. Shake or stir the bread by hand two or three times before
going to bed, and it will dry out more evenly.

Day of: Since dinner prep takes most of the day, I usually start this in the
morning, getting the stuffing oven-ready, then leaving it in the fridge
until I'm ready to bake it.

Start by pouring the bread pieces into the giant bowl. Melt the butter in a
saucepan. Add the onions, but do not brown, just let them soften in the
butter. Pour this mixture over the bread once the butter is all melted and
smells incredible.* Mix thoroughly. The bread will still seem dry. Add hot
water a few tablespoons at a time until all the bread seems damp and sticky.
Err on the dry side! If it gets too wet you will end up with bread mush. The
trick is to go slowly. Pour a little, stir a little. If you are going to
baste with turkey juice (I don't because it can end up greasy) you will need
very little water.

Seasoning: I go very light on the salt. It can always be added at the table.
I recommend about a teaspoon. Half a teaspoon pepper. For this size recipe
for the sage, I will start with a half tablespoon of rubbed sage. Stir it in
thoroughly and taste. Add more if necessary, but don't overpower it. You
should get a hint of sage in every taste.

Baking: I usually bake the turkey at 350. I will add the two uncovered pans
of stuffing about 25-30 minutes before the turkey is going to be done in the
oven. (If you baste, no more than twice per dish or it will be too wet!)
After the turkey comes out, I will leave the stuffing in there another 5
minutes or so while the turkey is resting before carving. Cover them with
foil and a kitchen towel when they come out and they will stay hot for
another 20-25 minutes at least, while you serve and eat!

*Seriously. As a kid, this smell coming from the kitchen would wake me up,
which is how I learned to make this stuff. I participated in the
taste-testing, as well, so I became an expert.

Mary Wyatt goes by the name Middle-Aged-Woman online, a name she selected in a moment of capriciousness she now regrets, having actually reached middle-age. When she is not fanning herself on the back porch, she writes freelance articles, and maintains rawther a large collection of blog posts, most of which can be found at http://unmitigated.typepad.com.